Tough Lessons

I was downstairs tonight cleaning up in order to prepare for the week ahead.  It's always good to start the week off on a (semi) clean house.  Jason was graciously putting all the kids to bed for me.  So, I was off duty - or so I thought. 

As is usually the case I could hear a tear or two, a time out or two, coming from upstairs.  It was, after all, bedtime; protests are only natural :).  Tonight it was Hannah's turn. 

I don't know what went on and I wasn't going to go upstairs to find out.... Like I said, I was off duty.  But a few minutes after the cries I saw little feet sneaking around the corner where I was mopping the floor.  Two bright red eyes looked up at me searching desperately for a hug.  I wanted to tread lightly and not undermine the discipline that Jason had just handed out.

"Hannah, are you coming to give me a hug good night or do you want to talk about what just happened?"  At the moment, she said a hug was all she needed but a flood of tears told me otherwise.  As is often the case, we don't take their word when emotions are involved. 

So, I held her in my arms and sat with her on the rocking chair.  "Do you want to tell me what you did?" I asked, already knowing the answer.  She nodded no, naturally.  But after a few minutes of talking, I determined the tears were from the space between her and Daddy.  She had done wrong and he had reprimanded. 

"Do you wonder if he has forgiven you?" 

Nod yes.

"Well," thinking for a minute I explained, "I think you should go upstairs and ask, 'Daddy, do you forgive me?'" 

"I'm too shy," she responded with more sniffles.

I encourage some more and we practiced together.  Repeating after me she said the words a few times.  And then I walked her to the stairs and let her go the rest of the way. 

I heard the interruption of story time and the long silence.  Jason picked her up and put her on the bed.  He was waiting patiently. "Daddy, do," sniff sniff sniff, "you," sniff sniff, "forgive me?" And on came the outpouring of more and more tears.

"Of course I do, Hannah.  Of course I do." Jason responded, I'm sure with a hug to match.

It would've been easier to just send her back upstairs and go on with my work.  It would've been fine to let her just sleep on it until morning.  My heart wouldn't have been aching from watching my daughter struggle through something difficult.  But, I know that these tender moments are molding her and shaping her.  She's learning with us, those who love her more than our own lives, that asking for forgiveness is an initiative that must be taken to repair wounds.  That as much as her father here on earth loves and forgives her, she has a Father in heaven who's love and forgiveness have no equal. 

So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most. Hebrews 4:16